Be Still. Be Obedient. Be Humble.

I woke up feeling and looking like the Loch Ness monster this morning. I was more swollen than Honeybaked Ham on December 25th; it was bad. I woke up sounding and looking like an extra on The Walking Dead. When I finally got out of bed this morning, my dog looked at me and his head turned sideways. When I arrived at the mirror, so did mine. Had I been stung by a bee? No….IT WAS THE LUPUS.
I had a phenomenal time at GodChicks. It was amazing, and honestly one of the best experiences of my life. I felt powerful, renewed, and excited. As someone who has never and will never do drugs, I suppose I felt high on life. I had been drinking Jesus Juice and, by that, I mean reading scriptures. I was surrounding myself with amazing prayer warriors.  It was great! Loved it!
On a another note, If you follow me on Twitter you will recall my tweet: “Why do people choose mates who are exactly like them? I would never do that because I would end up living in a batcave made of marshmallows.” Somehow, I became overly excited about being in LA again and I thought it would be a great idea to start building that batcave.You don’t have to be in construction to know that Marshmallows do not make for a stable foundation. I thought that it would be a good idea to pack my entire life up in a car and move back to LA.

In my defense…Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. That’s what they all say, so I am saying it too. This was completely out of my character and I forgot to talk it over with my spiritual adviser, God. Heard of him? He’s pretty good.
I was caught up in the moment, and in that moment I made some bad decisions I had the “Vacation Syndrome”. Vacation Syndrome is when you are having a great time on vacation so moving there seems like a “good idea”. It felt good to be socializing more and to meet new people.I met up with some people I haven’t seen in years. I decided to “help” them move but they did not help out at all. Since the stuff was in my car and I needed the backseat which meant, I had to do. I was walking tirelessly up two flights of stairs about 15 times. I was in the sun too much and for too

long.

When it came to me moving, I carried everything down 3 flights of stairs about 7 times, without any help. I wasn’t alone either. I wasn’t getting enough sleep and I was under an enormous amount of stress after ending a long relationship. All of this was all my choice. I was doing it out of kindness and empathy because that is how my heart is built. However, there are people whether they mean to or not will take advantage of that. That’s the lesson learned. Prayed Up Now!

After moving all day, I drove down to LA with my stuff in my car with my Certified Service Dog. We made it to church for Celebrate Recovery. I was raped in 2007 and I was going to receive support and prayer to help me continue to heal.  I notified the individuals at the front that he was a service dog but I didn’t have his papers; I was refused entry. So I prayed.
I see the world through very different eyes that’s outside the “norm”. I always see the good in people and the fact is, even though those people weren’t really my friends doesn’t make them bad people. I have never been around party, drugs, and alcohol as an adult. I wasn’t prepared for the situation that I was walking into. It is just as simple as that. It doesn’t make me “dumb” but naive. My nativity isn’t a bad thing it just means that I am not that type of person which is a good thing. It doesn’t make me better or worse. I am just different.You just pray for people.This effected me greatly because I had been in remission, however, the stress caused a flare up. I was hurt by getting turned away. However, that was Gods way of telling me it wasn’t the center, circumstance, or company. So you pray.

Sometimes I think we get ahead of ourselves and forget to be still. I forgot to listen to his Word. Like many, due to impatience, I inserted my own words. Words have power. Even if they are not the right ones. This is not the way I would normally handle things. I was having fun and was caught up in the moment. I didn’t plan this entire move out, and I could have because there was no rush outside of the internal one that resided inside of me.
There is nothing wrong with being excited and spontaneous. However, spontaneity without a goal, is a risk. There is no risk in loving God. If you are making the right choices in your life then the risks you make shouldn’t break you but they should empower you. Pray.
It’s all about COMPASSION. That’s the crazy thing about dealing with an illness. Instead of people pulling closer to you, they pull away. They think “Well, I will just leave her alone so she can get better,” never taking the time to think that help and support could be vital in recovery. Pray for a Healing.
We are never alone. “Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he [it is] that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee”- Deuteronomy 31:6 –
Often times people will not come around because it makes them depressed. But what about the person suffering? How hard do you think it is for them? We are to lift each other up in hard times. If you have someone who is sick or hurting in your life, pray for them as you would for anyone else. Just Pray.
Instead of having the feeling that someone is posting things to make you sad or that you feel is negative, lift them up. Pray for them and encourage them to feel better.  Understand that having an illness is hard and though facts may make you uncomfortable, that is someone else’s reality. So you pray for them.
There are two kinds of people in the world. The ones who know there is suffering in the world and try to be a part of ending it, and those who just turn the channel. This fight is not easy. I am 100 percent sure that I will be healed in the name of Jesus. I’m praying for that.

I have amazing friends who care for me greatly! And I thank God for that.

At the end of the day, marshmallows are better for eating and not building. We will always make mistakes because we are human.The truth is, your TRUE heart will always shine through! That’s why I pray!!!!